It was reported in the news today that Canada has arrested Meng Wanzhou from China’s Huawei Technologies on the orders of the US deep state .
Meng is daughter of Huawei founder Ren Zhengfei .
The Golden Poodle is an internationally renowned prize , awarded for subservience and servility towards the US administration from foreign governments . In a world first the barking , beaming accolade was awarded to a person or group outside of the UK .
In this particular case the honour goes to the Canadian administration .
The Golden Poodle was handed to chief Mountie and arresting officer , Maximilian Mapleleaf . On receiving the award Max made this speech :
“Yes , we did arrest a Chinese lady and yes our orders came from above , as they always do , we only follow orders , that is what we do , if we don’t we will also probably be arrested . As you know our motto is ‘uphold the law’ , whether we uphold our law or somebody else’s law is our business , not yours .”
When asked whether he would put the award on his mantlepiece , Max replied :
“Mantlepiece ? Nah , I only like stuffed moose heads , I will probably put it on ebay and use the cash to buy more boot polish .”
With that Max abruptly galloped off into the Canadian wilderness .
A spokesperson for Donald Trump was contacted and asked about the award going to Max on behalf of Canada . An anonymous source had this to say :
“As you know , only the US administration and its pood…..ahem……I mean allies can spy on their citizens , we have a monopoly on surveillance and we would like it to stay that way . Do you have a problem with that ?”
(At this point the spokesperson glared at us menacingly and proceeded to pull a little black book and pen out of his pocket , at which point we fabricated a fawning flattering manner which seemed to placate
Herr the official . Who then continued his speech . )
“The thing about the Chinese is that they want to take over the world , they want to control everything , they want to have the biggest military , the biggest wallet , the biggest everything . We in the free world must prevent that .”
When asked where the free world was ,
Mein F ……….the official stated :
“Why , in my gated community , where else .”
When asked whether the arrest was in any way related to the future monopolization of global 5G networks and the restriction of free and fair trade , the
Oberste S …..official replied :
“It’s about Iran , as you know the Iranians have spread terror , fear and war throughout the Middle East , if it was not for the US deep state and it’s poodl……ahem…….allies… the whole area would be a mess…..it is only by surveilling every man , woman and child that we have saved the people of the world from themselves and we will continue to do so .”
(The official then went for his pocket again) .
“Unless you have a problem with that ?”